Re: It's your friends that make your world

Thank you Kamal for the background. We all love Steve and we will miss him very much. I've never been a big poster on here but I've been here from the beginning and I will truly miss his daily rants and comments of life. For the people who knew him well I know this must be hard as losing someone is, always remember the good things he brought into your life and his soul will live on forever.

Love and respect forever.

Steve James R.I.P

Always remember his music.

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This is very sad indeed. My thoughts and prayers go out to his family and friends. May he rest in peace.

Re: It's your friends that make your world

I am sitting here in my office and been reading this thread for the last hour and ... OMG how sad news about our Jibby :(

I cannot believe what happened. We conversed a lot of times with him in slsk and exchanged tunes and talked about music ... We miss you buddy

R.I.P

Re: It's your friends that make your world

Thank you Kamal. That was heart wrenching to read and soak in. I too felt like his big brother here in Pensacola. Ever since the day that Hafid introduced us, we had a deeper bond immediately. Usually after his many marathon sets in Pensacola, we would sit down away from the crowd and have deep long conversations, mostly about music, Florida EDM history and the set he just played or ask me to deconstruct and critique his recent Mcast show. We had a great respect for each other in just a short time. Before he made the move, I made an extra effort to be present when he played. The many times, with me and him in the room alone with the music pounding, bass shaking and him spinning. His dedication and commitment to the perfect mix with the perfect consecutive track each and every minute he played. From the day, that I wholeheartedly gave him my personal set of Sony studio headphones on the Pensacola Bay Portifino boat party, he never stopped thanking me. Ever time we met in person, he thanked me even after years gone by. Always wanting to repay me but I always told him that your repaying me with your friendship and music. I'm sitting here with 100 CDR stack that was for him and recent designed CD labels for our new monthly residency with Hafid that we started last month. His double XL FSM shirts that I just had made for him that was to be surprise since he couldn't afford them await. I had designed new Mcast MercuryRising artwork. So many plans for his residency with the FSM crew.

still distraught and shocked...

Re: It's your friends that make your world

Kam! Thank you for the story. I am sure it was hard to write what you just did. I did not know Jib beyond the realm of this site...but his influence and presence on all of us here at [ms] will always live on.

To all of you who were close with him I am very sorry for your loss. No words can explain or make this any better. All I can say is that I hope he finds peace.

RIP Jib --- we'll miss you :RockOn:

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Wow....reading everything you wrote Kamal was like a wave crashing into me....I knew all of these struggles and turmoils in his life as he reached out to me on numerous occasions and we talked for hours and hours....however reading it all over again is different....my heart aches for him and I am at least glad he is at peace....he is no longer suffering through the turmoils of his life

Kamal I know from talking to him all the time he thought so highly of you and loved you as a brother too....if you need to talk I am here for you as you have always been for me.

Steve we love you and miss you and may you finally rest in peace xoxox

Re: It's your friends that make your world

it's sad to hear about this. I never met him but always looked forward to the one day we probably would. I always appreciated the great support he had for someone like me. Sucks to hear about something like this happening to a fellow MS'er

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damn, it is still a bit hard for me. didnt get to sleep til about 3:30 last night :(

thanks for your story Kamal.. i knew about bits and pieces but your story really makes everything whole.

Thanks man.

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wow, very sad news

i never knew him personally but it sure seems like he had a significant impact on all those who did.

My condolences for his family and all that knew him

Re: It's your friends that make your world

I cry... Steve, I've known you since high school when we used to pound out beats in drum line. You've always been there in touch with me over the years, and for that I can't thank you enough. You were one of the only people in my life to consistently be there for me. I will always be glad for the friendship we had. You will be missed Jibs... love you man. "(_)"

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[FONT=Helvetica][SIZE=2][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=silver].....This is shocking really and hard to believe. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Helvetica][SIZE=2][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=silver]I first met him via internet way back in late 2002 on soulseek and he always hooked me up with music. I was mostly into his sets as he played some spectacular deep prog sets back then, [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Helvetica][SIZE=2][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=silver]I didnt meet him in person until one of his THM gigs at the bank in St. Pete with steve grahm (2005 maybe??) We hit it off really well...even though I had just met him in person it was like i had known him for years and we were the closest of friends.[/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Helvetica][SIZE=2][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=silver]The last time we hung out was for sasha and digweed at space in 2006. that ended up being the last time we went out together.... he was sort of irritated with me bcuz I wasn’t able to keep up and was itching to leave at around 11am (we got there at 10pm)…....he sent me this PM. [/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT]

[COLOR=silver][FONT=Helvetica][SIZE=2][FONT=Helvetica]"FAO chuckC... dont ever ask me to go anywhere with you again until you learn how to party like a man.[/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT] [/COLOR] [FONT=Helvetica][SIZE=2][FONT=Helvetica][COLOR=silver]no hard feelings chuckles. you're just not the same kind of "partier" i am. the fact that we almost got in a car accident after leaving space didnt help my frame of mind. i needed to go away. thx for helping me out with a room. hope you had fun cos i know i did. space was amazing."[/COLOR][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT]

[COLOR=silver]i will miss him.. he was a fun person to kick it with even though i coudlnt keep up.[/COLOR]

Re: It's your friends that make your world

terrible terrible news

i soooo use to look forward to a wedensday afternoon for his mercuryrising radio show.......it was even almost the highlight of my week

im so glad i use to tell him this as much as i could, and im so terribly sorry for all his close friends

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i have found strange comfort in this song...

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kCKob1YKOU[/YOUTUBE]

Re: It's your friends that make your world

Wow, Kamal, that was a very moving post! I knew some of what he was going through but not the full extent of his pain. I cannot even imagine the depth of pain he suffered that made him think that the course of action he chose was the only solution, but I sincerely hope he has found peace, and is in a better place.

R.I.P Steve.

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this place will never be the same. he was the heart and soul of ms.

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[quote=fsukimg;675469]I know most of you don't know me, but I was at that Digweed set in Miami with him and Mike and Corey. Steve actually went to high school with me, and he was/is an amazing person. I'm really sad to hear that this happened, and I know he's in a better place. xoxo. Still feeling a bit bad for not going up to Pensacola when I should have, or hanging out with him in town when he was nearby. He always made me laugh, even when I was upset or stressed. I'll always appreciate that. And he always talked about how he had such great friends on this site. So sorry for everyone's loss[/quote]

Thanks for posting Kim, I'm glad you got on here to share yer love, and I know Steve was as glad as I was that you were there with us this year in Miami. Here's a million hugs and kisses that I can't give in person right now: xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

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For fuck's sake....

:(

Re: It's your friends that make your world

Grieving like this is extremely hard. The whole family thing we got going here is no substitute for the real thing in times like this, I want to be able to hold someone, talk to someone sat in front of me about Steve. Instead, I get up from my computer and see people who have no idea what I'm going through, people who even if I told them wouldn't be interested. Not a bad thing really, after all, in their eyes, we're just internet buddies.

This is the turmoil that someone leaves behind when they die, I just wish Steve could have seen it before he decided enough was enough.

The cut is deep Steve, it's going to take some time to heal.

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[quote=w0e & cri5is;674993]i'm so torn and in sorrow right now... but i cant imagine the pain you guys are going through... :(

i'm a new face here, and tho i have never met him in person... he had made me feel more than welcome when i fucked up. in the little that i knew him, i understood him as a truly great and unique individual... one who's loving understanding, humor, inclusiveness and mix-sets, warmed and radiated far and beyond barriers, as well as penetrated and connected past our personalities and touched the soul. they say death is like the shedding of a hair or like the changing of clothes -- just a steady diggers transition. so have a nice biker run and journey Steve. im sure we will all cross paths in future lives. cheers foreva brotha.

best of wishes and regards to all family and friends. :(

edit: i just got back from my narcotics anonymous meeting this afternoon, and i pretty much cried when i shared... you can guess some of the things i shared about. i have this urge that i have to come on here and express to everyone here this, cos, there is little if anyone i can talk to about this kind of stuff in my life. friends and family are pretty much indifferent to experiences such as these... but im sure some of us here understand the subtle lonliness of depression, addiction, and such... help us.

i'm grateful for u Jib, thank you and respect.

RIP Steve[/quote] It sucks to hear the bad news about Steve, I enjoyed interacting with him on here over the years. :( I think he created the Diggers@ La Dune set thread? This is a classic...:p

Well WOE, I hope things work out for you, at least you have the MS family for support. 8)

Re: It's your friends that make your world

[quote=hulkhuss;675598]I think he created the Diggers@ La Dune set thread? This is a classic...:p

. 8)[/quote]

that was skahoud brotha

Re: It's your friends that make your world

[quote=chuckc;675607]that was skahoud brotha[/quote] oh ok, well i am sure jibs posted the most on there and revived that thread the more then anyone 8)

Re: It's your friends that make your world

[quote=w0e & cri5is;674993]i'm so torn and in sorrow right now... but i cant imagine the pain you guys are going through... :(

i'm a new face here, and tho i have never met him in person... he had made me feel more than welcome when i fucked up. in the little that i knew him, i understood him as a truly great and unique individual... one who's loving understanding, humor, inclusiveness and mix-sets, warmed and radiated far and beyond barriers, as well as penetrated and connected past our personalities and touched the soul. they say death is like the shedding of a hair or like the changing of clothes -- just a steady diggers transition. so have a nice biker run and journey Steve. im sure we will all cross paths in future lives. cheers foreva brotha.

best of wishes and regards to all family and friends. :(

edit: i just got back from my narcotics anonymous meeting this afternoon, and i pretty much cried when i shared... you can guess some of the things i shared about. i have this urge that i have to come on here and express to everyone here this, cos, there is little if anyone i can talk to about this kind of stuff in my life. friends and family are pretty much indifferent to experiences such as these... but im sure some of us here understand the subtle lonliness of depression, addiction, and such... help us.

i'm grateful for u Jib, thank you and respect.

RIP Steve[/quote]

I just wanted to put it out there that I am a recovering drug addict and attend NA meetings regularly. Kamal's post about jib touched me on many levels because that story is similar to mine. i have been clean for a while now and and please if anyone needs to talk or deals with the same issues I'm here to help in any capacity. PM I'm more than willing to give you my cell # and talk. i lost my first true friend that I didn't use with 5 months ago. the man saved my life and was always there for me. just wanted to put that out there.

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thx fellas, hangin in there... so thankful 4 {ms]

fuck drugs they suck hard ;/... please connect, compass and live for each other.

this has me heart wrenched. Godspeed Steve.

[quote=Jibgolly;669579]i grew up in biker bars around slob ass wastoids doing crank and coke. and weed was more or less the oxygen of choice. can't say the bikers i grew up with were violent gun slingers or murderers, but how much does a child know? i like the show, and not because i grew up in a bikers world, but because it's got good writing and a decent plot. some of the actors leave a bit to be desired, but overall i dig the show.

on a side note, i can't believe The Shield is almost gone. :([/quote]

Re: It's your friends that make your world

This is very sad news.

Just sat and read everybodys posts.

Think i first became aware of Jibs during my university days when abusing Audiogalaxy and Soulseek. MS was the natural progression.

I never met the guy, but his opinionated posts and twisted take on comedy always made me smile, and he was a key piece of the MS puzzle.

My condolences to all you guys who knew him, and I hope you all give him a proper big send off at your thanksgiving party.

The love in this thread is another reason why MS rules.

RIP Jib

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I'm heavy hearted in hearing and reading this thread. Unfortunately I did not know Steve on a personal level, my regret. He has touched lives without even knowing it. I personally have cried the entire time I've spent reading this. He has had an impact on us all and hopefully through time the tears will stop and the good memories will prevail, just as I believe Steve would have wanted it. So for Steve I write this that in the hopes if he's reading all the love that we are showing:

May the Dancefloor always be packed, the Soundsystem be pumpin', and may the Music never stop! Rest in Peace. Billy Z

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Hey guys/gals, i am gonna take a break from posting on ms for awhile. I can't stand the thought of coming on here and posting in other threads while i know what has happened as they say time heals all wounds. I promise i will be back though. Take care of each other and Steve RIP mate ;) PS Mods can we please bring back red1 please. Ciao

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this is a very big shock !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:(

R.I.P my Brother !!

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Oh, damn..... I'm at a loss. Man, I'm gonna miss all the laughs I got from his posts. Go ahead Jibs and shake the pillars of heaven.... RIP

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Thank you Kamal. Your post really helped with understanding why. The awful thing about the level of depression that he had was that you really don't believe that anyone would be anymore than a little upset. It's incredibly isolating . Being short of money makes it 10 times worse. You want to be independent, you want to be with your friends but you want to pay your own way. It's a really vicious circle :( So you see, you could not possibly have done anymore than you did, you just couldn't win against the bad things in his life. The pain is over for him now. But we will miss him.

I am so glad I got to share this place with him.

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I cannot believe it =( Rest in Peace dear friend!

Re: It's your friends that make your world

[quote=MJ;675583]Grieving like this is extremely hard. The whole family thing we got going here is no substitute for the real thing in times like this, I want to be able to hold someone, talk to someone sat in front of me about Steve. Instead, I get up from my computer and see people who have no idea what I'm going through, people who even if I told them wouldn't be interested. Not a bad thing really, after all, in their eyes, we're just internet buddies. [/quote]

You just totally expressed the way I've been feeling. I've tried to talk to friends about this and they just can't empathize at all. It's a very strange situation. I woke up last night at about 3am and instantly thought of Steve and the dread came back. The question "why, damn it" keeps going through my head.

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No words that I type will do any justice to the memories I have of Steve. Whether those memories are from hanging out with him or from this weird e-life, they will never be forgotten.

As a lot of you know, I don't get the chance to check [ms] even 1/100th of what I used to, but I PM'd Steve a couple of weeks ago to ask a question. He replied back and I checked the message. Each day would go by and I would think to myself that I need to respond back to say thanks and catch up some more but life would get in the way. I can't tell you how much it pains me now to think that every day bullshit got in the way of taking 5 minutes to touch base with a friend.

I'll miss you Steve. I know that you're somewhere right now calling me a fag because of these tears, and that's fine. Just know that you're sorely missed down here.

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Damn. I can't believe I just found this on here. Thanks Kamal for the writing, quite hard to fathom him doing that. I know I have had many times where I felt like that, and I'm just so glad I never went through it.

I always thought that i'd make it to this years WMC and finally hang out with Steve. From the way he wrote his posts...I always thought the two of us would have made good friends. He's about as nutty as I am.

Peace be with you bro. I kinda feel like driving down there to go to the funeral.

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This is a big loss to the MS family. RIP Jibgolly

Re: It's your friends that make your world

Fuck I've never been so affected by some interweb thing like this before. WTF. It's weird because the forum board is the only platform we've communicated.

It's like seeing the same face at the same club at every good gig and now that person won't be there, but fuck I wouldn't even be this affected if he was indeed some dude I see around in real life, does this make sense?

I just don't feel like posting anything else on the forum. Fuck I hate this.

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Very Heart Wrenching..

Re: It's your friends that make your world

[QUOTE=Mad'Em Fixer;674984]I want you all to know that the MS family was one of the brightest spots in Steve's troubled soul. He loved you all very much.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Garrick;675262]for the love of music he had, he had better be listening to some form of northern exposure. he talked about those like the bible.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=feather;675719]Fuck I've never been so affected by some interweb thing like this before. WTF. It's weird because the forum board is the only platform we've communicated.

It's like seeing the same face at the same club at every good gig and now that person won't be there, but fuck I wouldn't even be this affected if he was indeed some dude I see around in real life, does this make sense?

I just don't feel like posting anything else on the forum. Fuck I hate this.[/QUOTE]

so many weve known gone this way, i myself almost went down that path & know so many who had [I]One Saved Us All The Same[/I]

One More Reason to keep true to what WE do here. Some things are ment for to show the Path as it is, OURS! Thank you jib for anything you ever sent or commented.

GOD LOVE JIB & his friends on the www We Miss You

[QUOTE=DancingQueen;675409]Last night when I couldn't sleep again, I started writing....I haven't done this in a long long time. I wrote a poem reflecting the memory of Jibs that I will post sometime tonight after work if I get the courage to do so....[/QUOTE]

PLEASE DO ^HE^ LOVES IT WHEN WE DO ;D Its your friends that make your world [B]brighter[/B]!

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Wow. Jibs was always a bright light on MS and I could always count on him for a particularly insightful point and a laugh.

I am so sorry to the mods and the rest who were very close to him.

On to the next world Jibs. Now that you're there, pics or STFU. Rest in peace kind sir.

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To any of you who would like to come for the Friday 28th Jelly/Steve James Tribute please know our doors are open to you. Just let us know and we will make arrangements to put you up.

We understand it is a holiday weekend and you have family obligations however we would love to see as many of you as are able.

Also, any of you who live in South Florida please let me know if you want information about the funeral. I will have the arrangement information tomorrow.

I miss him so much.

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feather, hang in there man, this is all really hard to take in. i posted in the p&r section yesterday and felt guilty, so i know how you feel. if there is anything you need, please pm me