Another from the Onion. Their writers are fucking brilliant...
[url]http://www.theonion.com/nib/index.php?issue=4045&nib=2[/url]
[quote][b]Liberals Return to Sodomy, Welfare Fraud[/b] BERKELEY, CA?No longer occupied by the 2004 election, liberals across the country have returned to the activities they enjoy most: anal sex and cheating the welfare system. "I've been so busy canvassing for the Democratic Party, I haven't had a single moment for suckling at the government's teat or no-holds-barred ass ramming," said Jason Carvelli, an unemployed pro-hemp activist. "Now, my friends and I can finally get back to warming our hands over burning American flags and turning kids gay." Carvelli added that his "number-one priority" is undermining the efforts of freedom-loving patriots everywhere.[/quote]