Dear Santa, What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys? Your friend, Thomas

Dear Thomas, All the toys are made by little kids like you in China. Every year I give them a slice of bread as a Christmas bonus. I have a condo in Vegas, where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table.

"Long Dong" Claus P.S. Tell your mom she got the part!

:RockOn:

i knew santa was up to something

So he was the guy in the beard mounting the hot blond in the video I have...

Here is a bunch more

Dear Santa, I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer. Yer Frend, BiLLy

Dear Billy, Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a f#%king book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell! Santa

Dear Santa, I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and Joy in the world for everybody! Love, Sarah

Dear Sarah, Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they? Santa

Dear Santa, I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do. Love, Teddy

Dear Teddy, Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me get you some nice Legos instead. Santa

Dear Santa, I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba. Love, Francis

Dear Francis, Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays? I bet you're gay. Santa

Dear Santa, I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door. Love, Susan Dear Susan, Milk gives me the runs and carrots make the deer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a bottle of scotch. Santa

Dear Santa, What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys? Your friend, Thomas

Dear Thomas, All the toys are made in China. I have a condo in Vegas and spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table. Hey, you wanted to know. Santa

Dear Santa, Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when we're awake,like In the song? Love, Jessica

Dear Jessica, Are you really that gullible? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping Your house. Santa

Dear Santa, I really really want a puppy this year. Please please please PLEASE PLEASE Could I have one? Timmy

Timmy, That whiney begging sh*t may work with your folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again. Santa

ROFL, that shit is hilarious

Haha, class :RockOn:

lol.. thanks civic zen.. damn thats some funny shit

That shit was so funny I just text messaged my friend the entire thing. :lol: :lol: :lol:

:CrackUp:

Hahaha!!!I like this topic!!! :mrgreen: :Naughty:

[quote=Pataky P?l]Hahaha!!!I like this topic!!! :mrgreen: :Naughty:[/quote] Hahaha!!!you're so annoying. :evil: :lickmyha:

Re: Dear Santa,

:Laugh:

[quote=picklemonkey][quote=Pataky P?l]Hahaha!!!I like this topic!!! :mrgreen: :Naughty:[/quote] Hahaha!!!you're so annoying. :evil: :lickmyha:[/quote]

Tell me you believe too.

:CrackUp: :Cheerz: that is some good shit