SMART ASS ANSWER #6 It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline.
"Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.
"What are my choices?" John asked. "Yes or no," she replied.
SMART ASS ANSWER #5 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate
to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket
and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she
said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."
SMART ASS ANSWER #4 A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the
grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked
a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No
ma'am, they're dead."
SMART ASS ANSWER #3 The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped
for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day,"
the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a
ticket.
SMART ASS ANSWER #2 A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign
comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is
right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up
for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and
walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck,
huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out
of gas."
SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006!!! A college teacher reminds her class of
tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not
being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal
injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no
other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised
his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering
from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to
laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles
knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, "Well, I guess
you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."