there is a bit of truth in this

[B]How To Shower Like a Woman:

[/B]Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

[B]How To Shower Like a Man:[/B]

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-hoo' sound. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. Admire wiener size in mirror again. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-hoo' sound again. Throw wet towel on bed.

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

Ha ha! What's funny is that most of those are true.

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

Funny Europeans.

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

:CrackUp: so true, so true, i dunno y but when i look at my package in the mirror im so mezmorized by it, always have to look at it for at least a couple of mins.

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

[QUOTE=srbbnd]Funny Europeans.[/QUOTE]

Pssshhhht...as if Americans would do it the other way around...:D

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

There is too much truth in this. i laughed so hard at a few of them!

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

[QUOTE]Pee.[/QUOTE]

rofl.:Tongue:

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

this thing got me thinking about my whole ritual...

and i scratch my ass alot.

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"shower mohawk"

:lol:

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

so very true... :CrackUp:

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

"Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time[B]" [/B]

Guilty. :oops: And for a few other things as well I won't mention. :lol:

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

Guilty of almost everything except the package check since the damn mirrors have been placed too high around here. A bit lame to walk up to one and stare down it to still be able to check it IMO...not that there's something extremely spectacular to see anyway :roll:

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

hehe cute

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there are 43 added vitamins in my toothpaste.

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:shock: U a girl??

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Complete bullshit, what a dull life if this is how it looks going to the shower.

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no and i was just kidding

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it's all about the 4 S's for guys...shit, shave, spank (wank), shower:shock:

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

[quote=Yao]Pssshhhht...as if Americans would do it the other way around...:D[/quote]

We Americans are very refined...

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

o_O ah right, forgot about that there for a second...

...what about women's TRIANGLE?? they dont clean it? :lol:

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

Yea, what about that??

(nice subtle porn stripe above the V is cool, bald is overdone IMO)

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

Was gonna start a diff thread with this but it sort of fits to put it on here . Doing my bit to help the married guys on here .Print this out and post it on the fridge door . [B]Men's Rules[/B]

[COLOR=yellow]Women, learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.[/COLOR]

Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not considered by us to be opportunities to see if we can find the perfect present . . . . again!

[COLOR=yellow]Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow]Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.[/COLOR]

Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then you're stuck with her.

[COLOR=yellow]Ask for what you want. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it![/COLOR]

We don't remember dates. . . .Period!!

Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

[COLOR=yellow]Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow]Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow]A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow]Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow]If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.[/COLOR]

[U][COLOR=yellow]If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We've been tricked before!![/COLOR][/U]

[COLOR=yellow]If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.[/COLOR]

Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

[COLOR=yellow]You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow][U][B]Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.[/B][/U][/COLOR]

Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.

[COLOR=yellow]ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow]If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.[/COLOR]

[COLOR=yellow]We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.[/COLOR]

[B][COLOR=yellow][U]If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.[/U][/COLOR][/B]

[COLOR=yellow]If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.[/COLOR]

Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, or monster trucks.

Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.)

[COLOR=yellow][U][B]BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.[/B][/U][/COLOR]

[COLOR=#ff0000]Highlighted the ones i think [U][B]ALL WOMEN SHOULD KNOW [/B][/U][/COLOR]

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

"Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-hoo' sound."

Guilty.

Re: The Difference Between the Sexes

True all the way and always get telling off for doing all of those things:what